I’m with my husband, David, and daughter, Molly, and her family for a Weide/Blaich/Schultz family reunion in the Kansas City area. We haven’t been for about 10 years, so it’s bound to be a good time for meeting new people and catching up.

Dad’s column

But I’m reminded of a column my dad wrote in his weekly newspaper in 1956 about my mom’s family reunion. It was humorous and heartfelt. So I’m sharing it with you. We’ll see today how much has changed….or not!

Family reunion–1956

 

Last weekend I was subjected to one of those hectic and exhausting excursions that my good wife lovingly identifies as a “family reunion.” To me, they are strictly about hunger.

            Maybe I wasn’t brought up right, being an only child. Maybe I have missed a few things along he way including the joy of having numerous brothers and sisters—and a whole host of other relatives. At any rate, I know my wife looks forward to each reunion with great anticipation and zeal, a state of mind and exuberance reserved for only the more momentous events that occur in our somewhat humdrum lives.

            When I go to Kathy’s family reunion, I am just along for the experience and to drive the car. It is a great day, though, for the Weide family, however, and they make the most of it.

            My wife, as you may have surmised from her family name, is of German stock. Many members of the family see one another only on this occasion during the year, and they arrive in a most festive mood. Many of the female members of the tribe are, what I will call her for politeness sake, quite buxom. By the time two or three of them have given me the old Weide bear hug in greeting, and lavishly bestowed me with a warm, wet and friendly kiss, I am about in for the day.

            As is the case at any such gathering, there is always an abundance of food. I will say this for my wife’s family—they have a knack for preparing good solid food, and several of them are living poof that people can eat all the time and still move about.

            Compliments fly thick and fast at the Weide family reunion. Everyone compares their weight this year, as compared to last time, and it is considered perfectly all right if a few pounds are put on here and there—mostly there, I noted.

            “You’re a little fleshier this year, Katherine,” Aunt Mina says, “but it becomes you.” The Weide family has had only one skinny member all these years, and she moved to California to get away from all the advice about good health and the fattening process.

            And what do they say to old Joe?

            “Ya, you’re not looking so gut, Josef,” Uncle Gustav Blaich comments. Cousin Friedrich asks if I’m still in the weekly newspaper business, and after answering in the affirmative, he replies, “Ach, don’t give up…you’ll find somting gut vun of these days.”

            So the day goes on and on. Members of the family, who were unable to be present, and thus unable to defend themselves, really catch it as other members of the clan contribute choice bits of news and gossip.

            “Aunt______went and bought a new car and didn’t even have the piano paid for.” “She really didn’t need the operation, but you know how she likes to have attention.” “Confidentially, dear, that wasn’t a new dress she had on. She wore it two years ago to Uncle Otto’s funeral, may he rest in peace.” “Yes, they have an oil well now, but I can remember when they didn’t have a pot to put their baked beans in.”

            Finally it’s time for the evening dessert course and the packing up for the trip home. Weide family goodbyes take considerable time, stretching all the way from the table to the car door. We never get away as quickly as we plan because there’s always a last-minute exchange of information. Getting into the car is a major accomplishment at this point after more hugs and kisses. It’s a loving family.

            Maybe it isn’t all as bad as I’ve described, but I’m convinced that family reunions should be limited to one each 10 years. Every year is just too often to drive miles and miles just to eat a buffet in an atmosphere that rivals a Chinese fire drill.

            We’re agin’ it….but, then, it’s a mighty fine family hat gave me the wife I’ve got.

Among columns in one of Dad’s books

This is among columns in one of Dad’s books, Post Scripts by Joe Snyder, which is available through Amazon.